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DA GIRL ♥

Purrie ♥
sweetEIGHTEEN
Scorpio
o8nov1989
MJR
Single/attached



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*MeLody`DARLING!
Iris
SharOl
*Tiffany`SWEETIE!
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28 September 2005 ♥

ok..went katong on sat with yuki.. bot cigar.. wanted to buy next menthol de.. in e end next light.. yuki take one puff vomit alrdy.. den give e whole pack to mi.. den i smoke e whole pack within i think 3 to four hrs.. was feeling really down tat day la.. smoke without hestitating.. n oh ya.. saw alot of mjr ppl there.. saw hao wen,eugene n jerry.. den saw sky also loh.. he acc mi talk a while den go back play lan le.. worst moment of tat day was when i threw up.. the feeling was so awful.. how i wish i could threw out all my unhappiness.. now i understand why ppl drown their sorrows.. it really helps.. although not alot.. it does help.. to make mi feel more comfortable.. i was so damn scare i will throw up in e fucking cab.. jerk n jerk..den suppose to go yukis bf hse den i go hm de.. in e end i cnt ta han le,i alight with yuki n threw up immediately.. yuki was so fucking shocked.. keep ask mi ok not.. but seriously.. i do feel alot better aft throwing up.. at least physically..there is so many unhappiness i wanna voice out.. but aiya.. as yuki says.. no point la.. i cnt change anything.. since i cnt change anything i will have to change myself loh..

theres so many things i wanted to say noe.. i dun wanna keep it to myself.. but i noe i cant.. nvm la.. as i say.. u happy can le.. thanks for telling mi e truth.. rmb my promise to u not? aiya.. i think u dun even pay attention to wad i say la.. claiming tat im ur gd fren.. but i noe ur heart fly to her when u r talking to mi.. its ok.. im used to it.. although its hurting.. i promise i will nv let u noe my unhappiness to add on to ur burden... i just wan u to be happy n i mean it.. sometimes i tell myself,should i stay away frm u in case i cnt control my emotions n say everything out agn.. i really wanted to do tat although im not at all willing.. call mi selfish.. but i really do not wan to suffer.. but upon thinking back.. perhaps u need mi.. although not in e same way i need u.. but u need mi to talk to u when ur down.. n give u advice as to wad should u do or say to her or whatever to get into her gd books..n so i stay.. but its really really tough noe.. listening to u asking mi wad u should do to win her hrt.. telling mi u really wanted to be with her.. i do feel jealous u noe? it does not im happy just because im smiling..but i keep telling myself.. its ok.. its really really ok.. like wad i say .. ever since tat day i saw u so fucking sad.. i tell myself as long as its within my means.. i will do whatever as long as u r happy.. i will nv bother u should one day u r really happy with her.. but rest assured i will walk to u when u r feeling sad.. when u need someone.. i will always be there..

actually i have to say thank you.. aft i confess my feelings to u tat day.. u told mi gently.. i noe u tried ur best.. tried ur best not to hurt mi.. i promise i will control .. no matter how hard it is.. i will control.. n stay by ur side as ur fren..



you are the only reason for my precious smile ♥