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15 April 2005 ♥
Hmm,see ppl de blog so nice hor,so nice leh,bt I cn nv decorate e way I wan la.Cuz I duno how to anyway.Its ok la.. Today is just a normal lor..detention & detention & detention! Haiz,I finally understand smth,ppl do change & feelings do fade.There frenz of mine whom is nt e some as e day when I noe them.Rhys,he treat mi like heaven lots when we were 2gether,he gave in to mi,he encourage mi,he console mi,he give mi all e support I need.He ever promise mi tat he will try his best to make mi e happiest gal in e world.He told mi tat he will let mi go if I still love waiyi.Happiest?Which gal dun wanna be e happiest.But I noe he will nv b e source of my happiness.My feelings for him just isn’t there.He could tell mi a zillion times how much he love mi,how much he love mi,bt all this just dun get into my head.As long as there is love,there will b hurt.It will always b together.In my world,I only love just this 1 person.He is e only person tat I wanna give my hrt to.He is e one I love e most.And I noe tat to let him b happy,I have to let him go.I love him,but he love her.I dun wanna continue this game anymore,I`m tired.Because of e relationship between e 3 of us,I have to shoulder all those blame tat is nt even my fault.It is really nt mi.But nobody believe mi.Nobody did.Is it because I`m always e tough one swearing n scolding,I dun understand they dun believe mi,including him.I may b smiling all e times,all my frenz say so,but deep down inside,I have so many troubles I wanna get rid of.I have my frenz,my family,all my probs,all these in my life is nt going smoothly.I totally dunno where am I heading.I rmb tat on e day wy break with mi,I am shattered.I promise myself not to got involved with anyone again.For those who r spreading rumours abt mi since e day I stead with him till e reason we break.I will get u all get e whole picture nw.I have nth to hide.I nv do anything with him tat is wrong.I nv tried 2 break up him n jasmine.He knows it.Frm e day e sch noe I stead with him,all kinds of rumours is in e air.There were who say I am not good enuff for him,there were some who say he is just using mi,there were some who say he dun love mi at all.But wad really happens mi n him,nobody knows.Nobody fully understand our feelings towards each other,so wad right have u all got to speak ill of us? When we were together,e whole world says I love him a lot,they say I love him more den he love mi.And I will admit it,I really do love him,a lot.AT e period of time when we were together,he gave in to mi,he dote on mi,he tell mi all e things tat I needed to hear.He told mi how much he love mi n how much he will nv give mi up like he did last time.However,promises r meant 2 b broken.In e end,he abandon mi,mayb this is e ending most ppl wanna see.I admit tat I still do love him a lot after we break.But time heal all wound,at e moment nw,I have let him go,I have given up,I understand y he brk with mi n I dun blame him anymore,I wun ask y again.I accepted e fact we r not meant to be,n I give him my blessings.But y r there so many ppl sayin I`m tryin to brk him n jasmine up? I know for myself clearly tat even if he brk with jasmine,he might nt be with mi.We r still frenz,purely frenz.I can guarantee this to e whole world,tat I dun have anything 2 do with him anymore,there r no longer love or hatred between us anymore.Friends.Frm pri sch till nw,I have many frenz,but obviously,not everyone is true.Up till e moment nw,my true frenz r,tortoise peiyi mel zhaoz en rui hwei min n tats all.i noe in sch,many ppl have been backstabbing mi,they have been sayin tat I flirt around with guys.But this is all our frenship accumulated over e yrs we have spend in our classroom,bbqs,chalet..etc.. n a strong bond is build. I cherish all my frenz n I noe they treat mi genuinely with their hrt..